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Is it really Fall? I'm too busy thinking to notice
September 22, 2009
I'm in disbelief that it's the first day of fall. Where did summer go?
My mind and daily routine has been so focused on homechooling for the last couple weeks that I haven't been able to fully appreciate apple picking, fuzzy sweaters & socks, pots of soup, bugs and butterflies and yellow flowers against bright blue skies. We're doing and seeing them all but I'm just not really present - know what I mean?
After crashing yesterday night and re-evaluating life this morning I've gained some insight into the kind of mother and homemaker I am. I am very good at home organizing, home cooking, home planning, home making and even home cleaning. I am not so good at home schooling. By that I mean the traditional "school at home" approach to home education.
If you've read this blog for awhile you may be wondering, "I thought you were into relaxed (for lack of a better word) homeschooling?" Yes, we are. But every fall I get the urge to really "make sure" the kids are achieving "something". This year more than ever now that Celine is 10 and officially grade 5 age. I feel pressure (self induced) to "noticeably" progress in areas that I've neglected till now. But to say I've neglected them isn't fair either, they just weren't priorities at the time for our family. I'm asking myself and my husband "are they priorities for us now?"
The flavor of our homeschool environment is as much about who I am as a mother/individual/learner as it is about who my children are and what they want to learn. I can't be something I'm not. And I think it's fair to say I'm not a homeschooler. I'm not sure what I'd be called. Home director? Creative organizer? (as in I organize my children's creative endeavors).
I'm working this out. Talking, crying, thinking, wondering. So forgive all the homeschool related posts if you are coming here for say, soap recipes. Homeschooling is where I'm at right now and until I find peace in how we function as homeschoolers in this new stage of learning it will probably be a prominent feature* here at FIMBY.
*I've been working on (slogging my way through really) a three part series on how we homeschool our kiddos - our philosophy, practice and what it actually looks like day-to-day. I started it weeks ago but haven't finished it because I'm still figuring out the day-to-day!
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debbie on Sept. 23, 2009, 2:19 a.m.
I tried commenting about your homeschool posts a few days ago and the image check wasn't working somehow - anyway, i wanted to tell you that it is so helpful for me to hear another's journey, so talk it out!! I found your graduation goals particularly helpful, as I also tend to get itchy about what we're doing come fall...you know this, but your children seem to have full, rich lives in so many ways - the particulars will fall into place if and when they need to! What lucky kids they are to have such loving and soul-searching parents.
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shelli on Sept. 23, 2009, 4:10 a.m.
I love hearing how you work things out. I know I'll have so much to figure out when I start homeschooling. And I know what you mean - it's Fall, but time has moved so fast these past two months that my brain feels like it's back in July! Where did it go?!
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nicola on Sept. 23, 2009, 4:28 a.m.
i am happy to slug through it with you via your blog. we don't homeschool, but i am fascinated with most things education-related this year, in a way i haven't been previously. i am learning a lot through your processing of your experiences! i wish i had words of wisdom to share, but quite honestly, that probably isn't what you want or need right now. you already know this, but it's your family. only you (and damien) know what is right for it! hang in there. it will come to you. (probably waking you from a much needed sleep!) nicola http://whichname.blogspot.com
nicola's last blog post... play
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Shawna on Sept. 23, 2009, 8:49 a.m.
oh i'm honored to be linked! i couldn't believe fall was already here, either, until i went out and effortlessly found all that yellow. oh, i love that photo with the fluffies :O) i do enjoy your homeschooling posts. they give me a sense of paths to consider for the future. you have a wonderful way of laying thoughts out manageably. (hmm. words should exist if they exist with an un- infront of them....)
Shawna's last blog post... The giant garden post (part 1)
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Jody on Sept. 23, 2009, 1:40 p.m.
I have faith in you Renee!
You are an incredible mother, have a beautiful soul & fun loving spirit. You & Damien walk your path very sure footed, over what seems at times, like such uneven, gravely terrain. God smiled when He created YOU & takes joy in watching you use and grow with the talents He has given you. I shared this saying with your 'friend at blankie chronicles' this morning.....I think it fits to also share it with you. I have it posted on the board by my desk, and I LOVE it."Peace. it does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble, or hard work. It means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart." ~ unknown
You will find your path for homeschooling. Stay true to who you are ~ God creates such beautiful things! ;>)
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renee on Sept. 23, 2009, 7:46 p.m.
Thanks Jody! I saw that quote on your facebook today. Thought I should finally check out your page, I'm never over there. I love it, it's prefect for the space of mind and heart I find myself in.
Thank you for your kind encouragement. I feel better already having stepped back for a couple days from what I was struggling to accomplish. I think I know the way I just to to follow.
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Twisted Cinderella on Sept. 23, 2009, 8:16 p.m.
I am in homeschool mode right now too.
Twisted Cinderella's last blog post... Wordless Wednesday - 6 month belly pic
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kate on Sept. 23, 2009, 9:21 p.m.
Bring on the homeschooling mishmash:) I totally understand the undertaking it is to even begin to get a "big picture" for a homeschool year. For us, this is a very new concept too, driven by lots of the same thoughts and ages-- our Noah is a "fifth grader" this year too...I just want you to know reading this was like a big sigh-- just knowing other mamas struggle with the same things (although I wish, wish, wish I was an "organizer" by nature. If I let myself, this place we live in would be a giant heap of clothes and papers and everything else a crazy packrat collects. Good thing I'm married to a type-A the other way guy;)
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kate on Sept. 23, 2009, 9:22 p.m.
ps-- thanks so much for the link:)
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pennie on Sept. 23, 2009, 10:36 p.m.
i have been reading the past several posts you have written and feeling and i believe actually saying...yes, i know or me too, to all of them. it is fall and i am too busy to notice but i am glad to know i am not the only one. also glad to read your posts and take some deep breaths along with you:) i find the end of summer and beginning of fall to be such a busy and trying time in my family. (which i am sure has to do with big changes...) i also want to point out that your homeschooling posts are inspiring to me as i have begun to realize that the learning is upon us. i find myself drawn to other bloggers that talk quite a bit about this topic as i try to figure out how we will approach learning within our household. thank you for sharing what you do with the rest of us! so, will you be at common ground this weekend?!
pennie's last blog post... common ground country fair...
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Annette on Sept. 24, 2009, 12:12 p.m.
As uncomfortable as it is, going through the throes of agonizing and thinking and changing and "reorganizing" is often a sure sign that you are on the "right" path...and moving forward. Working through it all WILL deposit you on the other side and the effort and tears and figuring out will fall into place (with that "hindsight is 20/20" perspective) as necessary steps. Hhmmm...kinda like a wet, cold, rainy hiking weekend leading to renewed pleasure in outdoor life :0).
In the meantime...I love the glimpses into your homeschooling process and am glad you share the nitty gritty. And wish that I was homeschooling also (!!!).
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5 orange potatoes on Sept. 23, 2009, 12:59 a.m.
Love it and can't wait to see how you do it. I'm constantly moving things around and changing as well. We just sort of go with the seasons....winter is kind of cozy warm traditional studies then we loosen up as the weather becomes warmer. You know what I mean?
lisa
5 orange potatoes's last blog post... ?feel better? herbal wreath