Belonging


The purpose and ultimate irony of desire (The mountains are calling)

The purpose and ultimate irony of desire (The mountains are calling)

One of the hardest parts of growing up has been realizing we don't achieve our desires. At least not the way we think we will. The joy comes not in attaining what we desire, but in giving ourselves to the cause, the aim, the goal. Circling the desire, but never reaching it.

Living in no-man's-land

Living in no-man's-land

In my attempt to understand my life path, to explain the inevitable sense of loss and regret with midlife, I sometimes think "maybe I made a mistake, went the wrong way." But I didn't take a wrong turn that landed me in a place, physically and spiritually, where I feel the pain and loss of a broken world. I grew up. I woke up. I left the nest. I landed in no-man's-land with eyes to see the truth.

Beyond margins

Beyond margins

My capacity for becoming more aware of the margin is increasing. Maybe it's because my children are almost grown up, and that first calling of mine, to nurture and protect them, is coming to an end. All that energy and heart needs to go somewhere.

Moving to the margins

Moving to the margins

I grew up in the happy bubble of secure ignorance. This is not a bad thing for a child to experience. In fact I think it's one of the most developmentally supportive conditions, for childhood. But eventually you have to grow up and become aware of your own privilege.

Migration, Cultural Displacement, and Growing through Loss (an interview with Heidi Chupp)

Migration, Cultural Displacement, and Growing through Loss (an interview with Heidi Chupp)

Navigating change, feeling culturally out-of-sync, evolving through loss, Heidi and I talk about tough topics in this interview with hope, gentleness, and laughter. It was such a privilege to connect and find a kindred spirit.

Mother's Day in Ottawa

Mother's Day in Ottawa

It's impossible to know the twists and turns that a life will take, the potential routes of family and individual migrations. It's what makes life both interesting, and sometimes heartbreaking.

The losses we reckon with

The losses we reckon with

Not going to my grandma's funeral was painful. It was a loss to not be with my family during the remembering and celebrating of Grandma's life. Feeling shame, second-guessing my every decision, running down all "what if?" trails of my life doesn't help matters.