Moving Challenges ~ Counting to 1,000 ~ Winter Ski Vacation

February 3, 2012

This has been an amazing move for our family and the months since we left Maine last May and then arrived here in Gaspé last fall have been full to the brim with blessings.

Honestly, it's like I've been given a gift - the gift of dreams coming true and creating the life we want for our family.

We live surrounded by beauty. I spend every day with my husband and I love it. I'm home with my kids, I'm writing more. I could go on.

But life is far from easy and perfect (there ain't no heaven on earth) and there are struggles and challenges in the everyday. I'd like to share a few of these because I like being real and also because FIMBY is a family life chronicle and I want to record these memories.

Stuff I'm struggling with right now

The grocery budget. Oh my goodness the grocery budget, which I've blown (by a lot) three months in a row now. It's killing me (the family tightwad & money manager). Thank goodness it's not killing my husband who is working hard to support this habit of family has, called eating.

If someone has some real whole-food, gluten-free, plant-based, living-in-a northern-climate-and-rural-area-where-food-is-expensive tips for saving money on the grocery bill I'd love to hear them.

Keep in mind the only processed stuff we eat is rice cakes and salsa (ok, a few more but you get the idea), I cook our food from scratch, I already shop at the cheapest place in town for my produce, we don't eat animals (can't cut that out to save $$), I buy in bulk everything I'm able to, I've already lowered my organic standards, and there isn't coupons for most of what we eat.

The challenge of learning French. We moved to a French speaking province (four of the five of us don't speak French - yet). There are days I am SO excited about this amazing opportunity to learn a second language. If I had a bucket list this would be on it.

Then there's days when the reality of being a minority is lonely. But this is mostly ok since I honestly appreciate knowing what this feels like and the people here are warm, friendly and eager to help me learn the language. 

No homeschool community. Nada. I knew this going in, but I had hope there might be homeschoolers hidden somewhere. I still have hope, but it is waning. 

This is not such a big deal for me personally. I am strong and independent minded, I've been homeschooling for years and have confidence. Also, I have a growing community of friends I've met online. For our children though, it's more difficult. We have a strong family but friends matter also. 

The lack of good library services. We used to visit the library every week. We regularly had 40-50 library books in our home at one time. Now we we have about 15 and they are mostly French graphic novels. Cool books, but not what we're used to.

This is a huge learning curve for me. I finally accepted the fact that we are going to be a book buying family, mostly electronic as we don't want to accumulate books in our attempts at small scale family living. But this is hard and potentially expensive, and a big mental adjustment for me.

Banking, insurance, financial record keeping from a year of transitioning to self employment, living in two different countries, and three separate states/provinces. Need I say more.

Growing children. Navigating the beginning waters of transition to scholar/young adulthood for Celine is exciting but scaring and unnerving for me, and probably for her. I want to do this thing called motherhood to the best of my ability and these are biggie years we're headed into. And transition to anything is never easy.

Moving, specifically from a small urban city in the US to a small village in Canada. There is less "stuff" available here. This is mostly a good thing, we didn't move here for stuff but for quality of life. There is a local culture here that hasn't been swallowed by big box stores. We love that!

But along with no big box stores comes less stuff available in general. And although I've never shopped at Target and it's been years since I've been in a Wal-Mart, etc. I'm having to re-learn everything I'm used to buying and sourcing for our family's needs. 

When we lived in the US we got used to the good life of easy online ordering. There is no Amazon prime here, shipping is expensive and there is just less available, even online. Big adjustment for our family.

Please.

Change.

That's the word for all of it. The difficulty in the move has been the change.

And when I struggle in this place of "why did I bring all this change upon myself - willingly?!" I try, try, try to turn my heart to gratitude.

Winter Intention Biggie ~ Gratitude

Gratitude is a huge theme for me right now. Because I am so blessed and when I lose sight of that I need to bring myself back to that place - pronto.

Just this morning while editing this post (I do let myself get distracted by e-mail while writing sometimes) I got another e-mail from a friend pointing me in this direction. The universe is sending me this message, over and over again. I need to tune in and listen.

Cultivating gratitude, specifically, writing down the blessings in my life is one of my most important winter intentions.

When I originally shared that I was reading Ann's book One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are I was a bit dismissive with this comment:

"I'm halfway through and I have not found it to be a life changing read for me (at least not yet) but it's an excellent reminder for the life I'm trying to life. I've been practicing the discipline of noticing everyday glory and grace in my life, especially beauty, for years now. Ann's books is pushing me into a deeper practice of grace, thanksgiving, and joy - eucharisteo."

At that point last fall the book had not been as transformational as I was expecting. After all the press and hoopla it received I was expecting... something more? It took some getting used to Ann's prose and really, I know this stuff in my head. But the more I read I questioned - do I live it in my heart?

As I read I felt challenged to kick it up a notch. But not only that, I was struck with the reality that of how life changing gratitude really is.

And so I'm trying to be more diligent in writing the graces, blessings and gifts in my life.

I'm a writer, this makes perfect sense to me. I write to process and understand. Writing one thousand gifts seems daunting but I need to do it to keep my focus in the right place. Otherwise, my "gaze" wanders to the grocery budget, the bank account balance, my library frustrations.

It's a spiritual discipline I need to grow - not the writing (though that's helpful), but the right heart attitude. I'm starting to work my way thoughtfully through Mindset for Moms and it's a continuation of this same theme (though written much differently than Ann's book). I'm excited to be bringing that book to you here at FIMBY in a few weeks.

Next up... the nitty gritty of the rest of my winter intentions. Where I talk about finances, food, and friends. 

{All the photos in this post (and the next) on winter intentions are from our January ski vacation. Realizing I probably won't get around to writing a post dedicated to that trip (now there's a story - the situation, the stress, the utter relief and relaxation) I'm working photos of that trip into a few posts.}