Feeling Vibrant and "In Between"

July 20, 2011

Life is downright busy this summer. I haven't tried to be subtle about it or use the euphemistic phrase "the days are full". We all know that's code-speak for "life is busy" anyway.

This empty glass is not symbolic of anything (like feeling empty). I just like the sand stuck to the bottom

So here's the thing. My days are busier than ever... and I'm ok with that.

Now that we're temporarily settled, with basic routines in place, the days are mostly happy and productive. Busy, happy, and productive.

I'm so enthused about the life I'm living. We have a new homeschool routine that rises to the challenge of our children's growing intellectual needs (yes, I'm anxious to share that with you but it will have to wait) and there is a creative vibe that bounces around the house as my mom gets ready to launch her blog and as Damien and I explore multiple avenues of being income-earning "creatives".

And then there's Laurent's bustling card business. I'm not ashamed to admit that the past week the boy earned more than I did, which isn't hard since my writing income is at the (very) slow trickle stage. But still... Laurent's card "business" had us making trips for more ink, running to the post office, folding, and addressing envelopes all week.

A huge thank you to all of you here who have visited his blog, left comments and even bought cards. You have no idea how much this is helping Laurent in both his education (there is a reason to learn handwriting and spelling!) and artistic development. We are honored by all the support being given to our son. Truly thankful.

This print is available for sale on Laurent's blog

There's a good vibe around these parts I'm telling ya'. So much so that I've even been able to manage, without too much stress, the unending bureaucracy of moving across the border.

Amazing what feeling good about life (your health, creative endeavors, spiritual growth, personal mission, the whole works) does for your overall perspective on life's inevitable inconveniences and hiccups.

The latest bureaucractic hoop-jumping involves importing our car and trailer. Inspections, repairs, lost paperwork (on the government's end), forgotten paperwork (on my end), multiple trips to car dealers, mechanics, and inspectors. That is our life right now, along with all the creative energy that brings vibrance to our days.

And I guess that's how I feel right now. Vibrant. I love feeling that way.

My "little" brother who visited my parents and us for a couple days this month while performing in the Maritimes.

When I took time this winter to think about what my ideal day would look like (using some of Lisa's free resources) and how I might achieve that, I kept coming back to one word.

A word that would describe how I would feel living my ideal life. That word was vibrant.

For me feeling vibrant is feeling physically nourished and healthy in my everyday living. It's having energy to meet the demands of a busy homeschool and homemaking schedule. It's feeling spiritually safe but also stretched to trust more. It's being intellectually challenged with good books and conversation. It's having the time to grow creatively and develop my gifts. It's being outdoors and close to nature.

In short, feeling vibrant is feeling good.

What I'm realizing this summer is that vibrancy is not the absence of stress or idyllic days flowing one into the other. Vibrancy is having the spiritual, emotional, physical, and mental energy to deal with life's challenges and feel good doing so.

At first glance, I haven't thought these summer days to be ideal. This is not poolside resort living with room service (though it is very beautiful here).

The days are busier than all get out with meals to cook, writing deadlines, children to educate, travel plans, and then bureucracy to sort through. But in the midst of it all I feel great.

Yet... even in this season of vibrancy, the surging life of summer, I feel an inner tension also.

As we get ready to take our dreams to the next stage (I'm a very modest dreamer, Damien's the big visionary in the family) I feel the discomfort of being both in the moment while keeping an eye to the future.

Enjoying my parent's company and the gracious sharing of their home while looking ahead to being on our own again in a couple short months. Reveling in the joy of parenting these elementary years while watching our children become young adults before our very eyes.

Writing for one project while strategizing another. Trying to make the most of summer days because you know fall will come, and after that, winter.

Being comfortable in the constant "in betweens" might be one of my big lessons this summer.

Celine recently read Little Women and I pulled the following quote for her copywork and narration and after a couple days realized the significance of it's words in my own life.

Jo's ambition was to do something very splendid; what it was she had no idea, as yet, but left it for time to tell her; and, meanwhile, found her greatest affliction in the fact that she couldn't read, run, and ride as much as she liked. A quick temper, sharp tongue, and restless spirit were always getting her into scrapes, and her life was a series of both ups and downs, which were both comic and pathetic.

Ups and downs? Have those.

Comic and pathetic? In spades.

Don't even get me started on my temper (more like impatience), quick tongue (down tongue, down) and restless spirit.

I don't particularly long to run and ride, but boy oh boy I do want to write and write and write and I might just call that my greatest affliction.

And I do intend to do something splendid, though what it is I'm not entirely sure.

Jo would understand. Then again, most mothers would also.

And so my challenge in these busy days of creative energy, homeschooling (the most focused we've ever been), paperwork, summer living, managing one transition and preparing for another is to appreciate the moments (as they whiz by).

The moments of vibrancy, along with the tension of "in between". All of that is my summer.

Which is why I love photography so much and one of the reasons I write this blog in the first place. To remember the moments, that are the now, but will quickly become "remember the summer we lived with Nana & Papa".