I'm not selling you anything this season

I think this is one of my favorite posts! Two parts in this ring so loudly in my ears...

"I ask myself why is it that so many people bemoan the never ending grind of consumerism - stores open Thanksgiving Day, the onslaught of "buy, buy, buy" messages, ads now showing up in your Facebook status updates, etc... and yet no one gets off the damn train?"

"Sometimes in our attempt to step off the crazy consumer train we step right onto another, the "let's make this meaningful train", which can be just as crazy with the homemade gifts, at-home activities and (sometimes exhausting) DIY vibe of the whole thing."

I hosted my first ever Thanksgiving supper last night and my nephew had to rush off to get ready to head out shopping with his mom - on Thanksgiving night. My heart cringes for those who just don't get it...no time to be thankful; we've gotta get to the Big Box Store to get in line for the great deal. I don't mean to judge...I just find it disheartening that I hear people complaining about our entitlement-driven generations yet they're the very same folks who go out and shop all hours of the night buying so much that no one needs. AND then your second remark, oh my YES! It's like if we aren't shopping till we drop, we need to be doing every "special" thing possible to make it the most memorable holiday yet. Like the whole Elf on the Shelf thing...have you seen that craze? Fun for some, yes...not for this Mama. As if there's not enough to do, I have to come up with crazy ideas to do with this fake elf to convince my child she needs to be on her best behavior for Santa? Um, no...I teach her that her behavior needs to be what it needs to because that's how she needs to be...not because of some elf. But to each their own...this Mama won't own that. :-)

Thanks for the great read this morning. It was a welcome respite from all the "great deal here" posts on fb and the emails. Wish you and your family a wonderful holiday season!

Hi Renee,

Love this!  I blog primarily to document our family's journey and to share another lifestyle option - and there is a slight bit of our business promotion.. but really not much.  I also enjoy so much more the season we are beginning  by leaving out the consumerism as much as I am capable of - the slowing down, the time to play more (inside and out).  The older I get the easier it is to simply let go of all of the ridiculous expectations I have put on myself in the past - really we are the ones that do it to ourselves - no blaming others - because we choose every minute how to react.   

So we choose to keep it soooo simple, and relish the wonder and joy of the coming season too.

Thanks for sharing because I sometimes feel awfully alone.

Thinking of you. Love, Tonya

I accept, the invitation to celebrate.  We're spending this day letting those we cherish know how much they are loved (both near and far) and going skiing this afternoon :)

And, I'm not one to paste links.  I figure if you and any other readers are curious they can look something up themselves.  Have you ever heard of Advent Conspiracy?  They have a promo video on youtube.  They've raised an invitation to all this season that is (I belive) worth while.  The thing that gets me every time is the statistic that Americans spend roughly $450,000,000,000 a year on Christmas (quoted in promo video, stats based on the National Retail Federation).  Yikes.  Our family hasn't adopted this way of thinking step-by-step, but it redeemed our perspective on Advent ten-fold. 

Here's our thanksgiving blessing, I'd like to share it with all:  May this weekend, spur worship and gratefulness, ignite joy that kindles contentment, provide quiet and solitude, whisper hope for the things unseen, invite laughter into mistakes (both noticeable and private), refresh tenderness, bring each and every treasured friendship to mind, and gather you in moments of rest to restore your spirit.

Sigh.......of relief. Thank you.

Love this.....so relaxing. Each year we have stepped further away from the consumer train. We have started making many of our gifts this. But I see the trend moving from one kind of pressure to another. Don't spend make! I find joy and relaxation in making gifts for my family. I so enjoy the planning and giving of something special to that individual and seing them enjoy it BUT I never want it to become something I have to do. 

I find simply giving people words of encouragement in a card can be a precious gift. Giving is about the person not the gift itself. We still have many steps of growth in this area but are moving where we would like to go. We have discovered making gifts has brought us together as a family. It gives us something to gather around and be very purposeful about. 

Let us know how your training for your hike thru is going. I am very much looking forward to following your family through this adventure. My training right now consist of physio exercises from ACL surgery. No big physical activity till spring then on to finish earning my black belt and hiking again....yay!

Thanks so much for this post. I appreciate any break from being advertised to, but since we have decided what we are purchasing for the holidays, I am pretty impervious to those messages. What I appreciate even more is the recognition that even our search for handmade, meaningful activity can become another needless list of to-do's. 

This year, I want to opt out of doing more, being more, and opt into just saying a quiet yes to what comes along, seeing what becomes of the space I make with not orchestrating a parade of wonder. My guess is, wonder will come, all the same.

Yes! I love what you wrote about stopping off the consumerism train onto the meaningfulness train. I have scaled back both our gift giving and my gift making each year and I still feel there is too much stuff on Christmas morning. My kids need a happy mama more than they need hand knits, and if the crafting is stressing me out I know which choice I want to make.

I am thankful for your attitude and your response. It's really easy to get caught up in the frenzy and just the plain 'getting' instead of 'being' around Christmastime. I am thankful that there are people, like you, who can guide us out of that, even if we didn't want to be in it in the first place! 

I haven't done much reflecting on the topic, but of the five 'Love Languages', I know my first one is gifts. That is a wonderful nuisance. :) It means I spend so much time creating, selecting, preparing, and even packaging gifts for others, I show my love that way, and I also feel immense joy in receiving gifts given to me. Just the mention of my husband taking me out for hamburgers (something we rarely do!) for the family gives me satisfaction of being loved.

Silly, maybe, though I love to be intentional about gifts for other people, and feel loved when they truly love/need/use my gift to them. That makes this time of year hard for me to 'trim the fat'. We don't give excessively--we have very little funds--but because I love the act of gift-giving so much, I do need to wade through and still get out on the other side of celebrating the birth of Christ first, instead of my own feelings and satisfactions of a perfect match. 

Also, April...wow! I think I had a mini-freak out for you! :)

Sarah M

THANK YOU.  This is the best post I've ever read at this time of year!  

We spent our Thanksgiving in Canada taking another look at Acadia Uni and lovely Wolfville (our daughter was accepted and may very well go). We don't ever enter in to all the consumerism....especially living in Vermont where you actually have to seek it out, but Wolfville was extra peaceful.  

"Sometimes in our attempt to step off the crazy consumer train we step right onto another, the "let's make this meaningful train", which can be just as crazy with the homemade gifts, at-home activities and (sometimes exhausting) DIY vibe of the whole thing."

This was my favorite sentence too!

Though I have been a faithful reader for many years, I am also a lazy lurker :). But this post was so spot on, that I had so say something! Thanks a lot for your very refreshing views on both the mainstream world and the "gentle mama/homemade/hippie" world online. Not just in this post, but also in many others. Most people I know in real life aren't familiar at all with the online blogosphere and they have no idea of the struggle it can bring about. Pinterest? Never heard of it. Crafting? That's for kiddies, yes?

I have to be honest to say that I sometimes raise an eyebrow when you make it sound very silly in a few well chosen sentences. But then afterwards I am always very happy about a blog that for once isn't always politically correct, gentle and fluffy. You share their 'crunchy' ideas, but you're allergic to the fluffyness around it, which is so rare to find. As a matter of fact, you are the only one I know who does it, so please keep offering your perspective. As a young mother I can get discouraged from those blogs, even when they are also inspiring at times.

Thank you, Renee...you are wise and an inspiration. I'm sure I'll be linking to this post from my blog.

Your comment on stepping off one train onto another resonated so much with me. In my efforts to simplify I often go overboard on trying to make things. While I would much rather spend an afternoon at my sewing machine than at the mall, chunks of time to indulge in handmade time is rare in simply the reality of daily life. If only the laundry and cooking could be put on hold for the holidays, heehee.

I do feel the need to speak up about the Elf on the Shelf comments that have been made. We have one and our family loves him. We do not use him as a bribe for good behavior, though we have been known in a really bad moment to say "remember he is watching". And we do not put him up to crazy antics. He is simply in a different spot each morning for our kids to find. My daughter made a blanket and pillow for him. He shows up when we come home from Thanksgiving holiday and he even stays for a couple of days after Christmas so he can see the festivities and the joy. My sister and her husband don't wish to get one for my neice because of the "bribery myth". I think he is pure magic and it is all in how you present him to your children. I feel like she is missing out. 

Happy Holidays to all! And praise to the simple things.

LOVE THIS!!! I jumping on the Renee Train!!!:}    

Like so many others the line that deeply resonated with me was the one about stepping off the consumerism train onto the train of meaning. And I love your idea of simply living life and letting this month be as magical as all the others, in its own unique way. Thank you for these words of yours. 

This is why I'm so glad I never succumb to the temptation to delete the newsletter, even when it sits in my inbox for over a month.  This is brilliant, and I continue to adore you and wish I were your neighbor.