A Tennessee spring story

May 4, 2015

Day 33: May 2 -13.3 miles Hogback Ridge Shelter to Whistling Gap

From my journal:

Got out of bed this morning cranky about my time needs not being. No time for writing, journaling, photo editing this week... not wanting to surrender to the trail if that's what it means. Started the day complaining to D.

A lot of beautiful rolling terrain, some of my favorite terrain. Pretty views from Big Bald and the carpet of wildflowers going up was spectacular.

There were high points but I started ragging on D. later in the day - sore feet, long day. I just get tired of hiking. Damien reached his limit by the end of the day. We were silent through camp, supper, and clean-up (beautiful camp setting) and finally before going into separate tents we let it all out, in tears for both of us.

I miss intimacy with D. I am frustrated by the lack of time for things that matter to me, which makes the physicality of this adventure hard. D. is frustrated that his family doesn't appreciate this adventure for the opportunity it is, that we don't appreciate this time with him.

Going down into Sam's Gap, wildflowers and a Scarlet Tanager.

Part of the reason it's been so hard to write about our hike is because I don't know which story to tell. The small glimpses of trail life shared in journal entries, photos, and video are fragments, slivers of a complex and intense experience.

Even while we were on the trail we marveled to each other how hard it would be to convey the depth of our experience to the uninitiated. This is one reason why trail community becomes so important and close. And it also explains why Damien and I were so grateful, even on the days we found it hard to speak to each other, to be doing this together. It may be hard, but at least we shared in the hardship. And those beautiful views and quirky people wouldn't have to be explained to each other, we both got it because we had been there.

Climbing up to Big Bald, a carpet of Spring Beauties.

When I look at the photos it looks beautiful and even magical. When I read my journal entries it sounds depressing. When I watch the videos it's upbeat and inspiring. All of the pieces are accurate, in their own way. They just tell different parts of the story.

Summiting Big Bald, signing log book at Bald Mountain Shelter (grungy shelter if I remember correctly), and camping at Whistling Gap.