Get posts by email
Ides of March (on St. Patrick's Day)
March 17, 2012
(No Weekend Edition links today.)
I just learned about the Ides of March this week. We were reading Chapter 35 in The Story of The World: Ancient Times (the one that's taken us about 2 years to read through) and came across the significance of March 15th.
While reading the gruesome (but sanitized for young children) details of Caesar's death to Brienne and Laurent I had Celine do some do some research for us. She's good at that - researching, reading and then teaching us some of the missing pieces to the story.
And this is when I made the Roman history ~ March 15th ~ Ides of March connection.
Just a useless bit of trivia from this learning-all-the-time homeschooling mama.
All of that to say it's the middle of the month and what a hum dinger it's been.
our winter wear bin
Winter was going so well - my best yet. First there was joy, then there was peace, then there was skiing. And now this.
March - the month of endless winter and Daylight Savings Time.
The extra light at supper time is wonderful. It literally lightens my heart. Over sleeping five days in a row, shortchanging my morning quiet time - not so wonderful. It's partially my fault for getting engrossed in a fabulous read and not turning out the light till 10pm. But really - 10pm lights out (and I fall asleep fast) should get me up by 6am. Alas is does not. I'm struggling to adjust.
It feels like the edges of my life seem to be unraveling a bit this month.
I am launching my first e-book next week. You might be thinking, "that must be cool to write and publish an e-book." Right now, not so much. It feels like giving birth and just like a laboring woman (you may not want to visualize this) - I feel a bit stretched right now. And like I’m losing control just a wee bit.
That happens in birth, producing art, raising children, loving husbands. Oh yeah... that happens in life!
My mind has been playing with this birth analogy in part because of the natural season around me, the book I'm reading, and having just submitted Laurent's birth story for a friend's blog. I'll link to that when it publishes. But really birth is such a perfect metaphor for where I'm at.
Let's just hope that the newborn days and months of exhaustion and sleep deprivation do not follow!
The promise of spring is just around the corner. I know it. The warmer and longer days tell me this.
But hoping for spring does not take away the realities of living.
The push and pull of this month's work, home management and school. The self-doubt that creeps in and insecurities in spades as I dip my toe in the waters of online publishing. The loneliness we often feel in our journey.
The hard discussions I've had with my life's love as we break through and move forward - on many fronts. The stress of the bank account hovering dangerously low (who needs extreme sports) as we await payment for work done.
our neighbor visiting on his snowmobile
This push - the stretching, risking and trusting simply goes with the territory of the life we've chosen. We all experience this, just in different contexts.
For me, it happens to be really pronounced this month.
It goes without saying that I am blessed with my life - my work, my relationships, my activities. The whole thing. I am so thankful for love - when you love on your children they love you back when you need it. This is such a blessing to me.
I am thankful for regular routines and disciplines (one day a week, simple winter suppers, anchoring) that carry us on autopilot when needed. I'm enjoying growing relationships and connections in our new community. This is all good. But I am weary this Ides of March and looking forward to spring.
-
Catherine Forest on March 17, 2012, 2:25 p.m.
Renee, I hope you will feel more balanced soon and that the post-partum will not be too rough! I know you know this, but go to the essential, let go of what you think it should be like at home. It is not a good feeling to feel like we are loosing control, but it is also a good lesson in learning to let go... Because it is much easier to learn to let go of things we decide to let go of...
The more I simplify, the more I let go of control, the happier I am and the better we all are as a family...
-
renee on March 17, 2012, 3:03 p.m.
Isn't that the truth!
-
-
kyndale on March 17, 2012, 4:23 p.m.
I feel the urgency in your "voice". It must be all piling up on you right now. One thing I deal with all the time is not having enough money but my husband has a job and that's a blessing for me. I wish sometimes we could do what you are doing but I don't know if I could handle the uncertainty of funds coming in. I know the point of what you're doing isn't about dealing with uncertainty. It's about living a meaningful life.
When I was in college, my senior project was a humdinger. I lived, ate and breathed that project. I was proud of it in the end but I often wonder why put so much pressure on myself. I got an A and that felt really good. I am so looking forward to buying your e-book because I know it will be a great read.
Much love, Kyndale
-
Kika@embracingimperfection on March 17, 2012, 9:17 p.m.
The book link (to the book you are currently reading) isn't working.
I understand where you're at. Light makes everything feel better, though - agreed!
Thank you for always sharing real life; real life is both beautiful and tough. Good to know I am not alone.
-
renee on March 17, 2012, 9:22 p.m.
Thank for the heads up on the dead links (I found another one!). And if it's not real I don't want to write it. My joy is real, so are my struggles. It's all part of the story. Nope, you're not alone!
-
-
Tina Razzell on March 18, 2012, 12:20 a.m.
I love your analogy that publishing a book is like giving birth. I have done both and it is so true.
-
foxbrooken on March 18, 2012, 2:51 a.m.
After our homebirth with our second child, our midwife had me talk to a retired midwife whose book I had read when I was considering homebirth. When we spoke, it was a dark time for me, and this midwife wanted to help by giving me some perspective. She told me that "Birth is a metaphor for life." She went on and gave me examples. So, I enjoyed your analogy of birthing your book, and I hope when you're "postpartum" you'll be able to sleep and not have hourly night feedings for months or even years.;)
Could you tell us about your winter wear bin? We are a year-round outside family too but we are occasionally frustrated with our current winter wear set up. Thanks!
-
renee on March 19, 2012, 2:12 a.m.
Basically we have one space where we store everyone's gear - we each have "slot". Everyone is responsible for keeping their mitts, hats, gaitors, ski paraphenalia (skins, leashes), etc. in their section. Pretty simple really. Another similar system would be to each have a stacking bin. We find this works better than one bin for mittens, one for hats. People take more responsibility for their gear. When there are extra unclaimend mitts - whose responsibility is it to care for those, etc.. This system cuts down on unneeded multiples also. It's easy to see what everyone has, what they need, etc...
-
-
Wanda on March 18, 2012, 5:46 a.m.
I literally stumbled on your blog and have been enjoying your writing for the past week. I was looking for kitchen cabinet pictures! Anyway, your life seems crazy like mine so I want to encourage you in the awful month of March. It's ok to sleep in. Wanda
-
Spring on March 18, 2012, 12:57 p.m.
This is how it feels every mid-March for me. I was talking with a friend the other day, and she was sharing how she didn't know if she could homeschool another year, so was so burnt out. I told her that I realized last year, that I feel that way EVERY March- and then by May, and finishing up a of what we do, reflecting on the year, I see how wonderful it was (despite the bumps), and am ready to plan the next year! She laughed and said "Wow. I think this happens to me every March, too, now that I think about it!" (I think I would be even worse off if our new weren't almost gone though!)
You can subscribe to comments on this article using this form.
If you have already commented on this article, you do not need to do this, as you were automatically subscribed.
Jennifer @ kidoing! on March 17, 2012, 12:57 p.m.
Does it help you to enjoy every moment living in your cabin knowing that you won't be there for much longer (assuming you're still leaving in the next several months)?
Nice looking salad...I can't ever seem to chop my veggies small like that!
renee on March 17, 2012, 1:20 p.m.
The kids chop the veggies for salads. Oh yes, we are still moving in 2 months and it does help me to enjoy the moments for sure. Now, if we only knew where we were moving to.... that's the next "big thing".